It wasn't love at first sight.

But it was close.

I met him at a party during the winter. I was just standing around, chatting with some of my girlfriends when he walked in through the sliding-glass door.

He was too short (about 5'6", the same as I was), too pale (like I was), and too skinny (even more than I was). He was wearing tight blue-jeans, and a well-worn Cure T-shirt. His face was kind of pimply, but cute, in a tragic sort of way. As soon as he was in the door, he pushed his died-black, shoulder-length hair out of his eyes. It was a gesture that made me feel like my heart would shatter into a million tiny fragments reflecting nothing but his pouty mouth and sad eyes.

When he glanced my way, I was still staring at him, but he acted like he didn't even notice me. I felt like I wanted to die, until, about ten minutes later when he walked over to talk with me.

"Hi!" he yelled, trying to be heard above the music.

"Hi!" I yelled back.

He then yelled something at me that I assumed was a question.

"I can't hear you," I shouted as hard as I could, pointing to my ear.

He nodded, and led me off by the hand.

He led me through a crowded bedroom, into a small, fairly clean bathroom, and locked the door behind us.

"I'm Julian," he said, extending his hand.

"I'm Christiane," I told him, shaking his hand. It was all sweaty, but I'm sure mine was, too. I noticed for the first time that he was wearing black eye-liner and mascara. It looked good on him.

"Nice to meet you."

"Same here."

I turned around to examine myself in the mirror. I had a zit on my left cheek, which I tried to ignore, and some sweat on my forehead which I dabbed off with some Kleenex. I then reapplied my lipstick (red), although I didn't really need anymore. I was kind of nervous and focusing on my appearance seemed like a good way not to show it. I flipped my hair (which was long, dark, and stringy) forward, then back, smiled at my reflection and then, still smiling, turned to face Julian.

"Don't worry," he said. "You look gorgeous."

"Thank you," I said, dropping my head and glancing around at the floor.

"So where do you go to school?"

"Saint Augustine," I said, clasping my hands together in front of me and slowly twisting my body side to side.

"Oh, a good little Catholic girl, huh?"

My head still lowered, I peeked up at him. "Yes," I said, batting my eyelashes and smiling as demurely as I could. I loved it when I got a chance to use my innocent little girl routine.

"Really?"

I lifted my head up and laughed, "No. Not really."

"Not really?" he queried, grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

"Nope. Not really."

"That's good, because you've got something on your lip."

"My lip?" I said, turning back to the mirror, carefully examining my lips, and then turning around again to find him standing directly in front of me. "I don't see anything."

"That's because you're not looking carefully."

Figuring out his game, I played along, "Well, where is it then?"

He moved his lips to within inches of mine, "There."

"Where?"

"Here."

And he kissed me. I felt as if somebody had replaced all my bodily fluids with gasoline and then tossed a lit match down my throat.

As we continued kissing, I felt Julian's cock become erect up against my body. I loved it when guys got hard just by kissing me. I pulled Julian tight to me, kissing him as passionately as I could.

Just then there was a banging at the door. Julian pulled away and opened it. I turned back to the mirror.

"Hey, why don't you use the bathroom upstairs? This one's occupied." Julian told someone standing outside the bathroom. Then he closed and locked the door again.

"Sorry about that."

"That's okay," I said cheerfully, still looking in the mirror.

My breasts were, perhaps, a little small, but they were perky enough. I never really used to give them all that much thought, but my friend Kathy had just been telling me a few days before how her boyfriend, Craig, told her that as soon as she turned eighteen he wanted her to get a boob job. Kathy told him to go to hell, but later she told me that she was seriously considering getting one.

Oh well, I thought, turning around to Julian, I've never had problems with my tits before so there's no reason why they shouldn't serve me well tonight.

"So where were we?" he asked, moving in on me and putting his hands around my waist.

"We were talking about school," I said, halting his advance with my right index finger. Since I had regained some control over myself, I wasn't ready to loose it again quite so quickly.

"Oh," he said, smiling. "I don't go to school."

"Why not?"

"Because I already graduated."

"Really?" I asked, surprised. I thought for sure he was only about my age.

"Really."

"How old are you?"

"Twenty-one. What about you?"

"I just turned seventeen about three weeks ago."

"Hmm. That's pretty cool. Happy Birthday."

"Thanks. So, you got any drugs?"

"Drugs? I don't have any--well, wait," he said, digging around in his pocket, and pulling out a tiny baggie. "I got this last hit of acid you can have. Want it?"

"Sure."

"All right," he said, opening up the baggie and dumping its contents out into his palm. "Open wide."

I did, and he stuck the little piece of blue paper on my tongue. I chewed it for a few seconds and then swallowed. I wasn't really all that into drugs, but I liked to take whatever was handy at parties.

"Aren't you gonna take any?" I asked.

"Naw. I'm already on six hits."

"Six? That's pretty cool."

"Yeah, I guess. So can we kiss again now or what? I was really liking that."

"I suppose so," I said, smiling.

And so we started making out again. It wasn't long before he pulled my flower-print dress off over my head and buttoned down his pants. I pulled off my panties, jumped up backwards onto the counter, kicked off my clogs, and crossed my legs.

Now I must tell you, I was not in the habit of sleeping with just every guy that led me off by the hand. But I knew Julian was special. I can't really tell you how I knew; I just knew. It was a feeling deep down in the pit of my gut. It sounds cliched, I know. But what can one do to describe such things? No matter how hard we try, words can never do them justice; they can never describe these feelings fully. But believe me, I knew it would be more than a one night stand. Much more.

Still, it's better to be safe than sorry, so I pulled a condom out of my purse and held it out in front of his face, "Use this, okay?"

"Sure."

He took it and put it on with ease. I then spread my legs and let him in.

Whenever I wasn't at school or studying at the library, I was with Julian. We spent most of our time together at his apartment, mainly watching movies or having sex. Usually, I slept over, and he would let me take his car (a somewhat beat-up, red Fiero) to school.

His apartment was a dingy little thing located in a rundown neighborhood. To me it was heaven.

One day, kicking back on the sofa after we had just finished watching the The Elephant Man, I was thinking about how much I really liked Julian. He cried three times during The Elephant Man which took me completely by surprise. I'd never had a guy cry in front of me before. In fact, I'd never even had a guy admit that he cried at all. I cried along with Julian, but more because he was crying than for the movie. There was something about his unabashed weakness that drew me strongly to him.

I stood up and said, "I have to pee."

"Hey, can I watch?" he said, looking at me with bloodshot eyes. Eyeliner streaked his face making him look like a victim of domestic violence. (I didn't have that problem because I wasn't wearing make-up. Except when I went out I hardly ever did wear any. Rarely, however, had I ever seen Julian without some kind of eye make-up on. One time, I asked Julian why he always wore it and he merely replied that it helped him feel safe.)

"Watch me pee? What for?"

"I don't know. I've never seen a girl pee before. I think it'd be cool."

"Why?"

"I don't know. I think maybe I'd find it erotic."

"Really?" I said, sitting back down again. "That's kind of funny you said that, because it reminds me something."

"When you were a little girl and used sneak around trying to watch boys pee?"

I laughed, "No. Not exactly. It--"

"You mean you snuck around trying to watch little girls pee?"

"No. I-"

"Then you used to run around peeing all over the playground for just anyone to see?"

"No," I said, punching him playfully on the arm. "And if you'd just shut up and stop interrupting me, I'd tell you."

"Sorry," he said, lowering his head in mock sheepishness.

"Well, when I was a little girl, oh, I think it was in the second grade, there was me and a couple of other boys who did used to sneak around and do things."

"What things?" he started to ask, until I stopped him by putting my fingers to his lips.

"Sssshh and I'll tell you. When the class watched movies, and the room was dark, we three would sneak off under one of the desks and pull down our pants, or lift up our dresses as the case may be, to show each other what we had. Usually we would all take turns gently touching each other's...you know. We also did this during recess at the far end of the playground behind one of the big trees.

"One day I told them that I had to pee really bad, and that they should wait until I got back to start, but one of the boys, Corey was his name, told me to just do it there. Some days when I wore a little sundress, I would take off my panties before school because I knew they'd just get in the way later. That day I had, so I just spread my legs a little, lifted up my dress and let go. Well, I accidentally got some on Corey's shoes."

"Cool."

"So then he," I said, and giggled, "whipped out his little pee pee and started squirting it at me."

"Whoa!"

"Yeah. And then the other boy joined in as well and we all started spraying each other."

"Well that wasn't very fair."

"Obviously. I mean I couldn't aim very well or even squirt very high.. They soaked me through, however. They even got pee in my face."

"Wow. I wish I could do that."

"What?"

"Pee in your face," he said, laughing.

"Nope. Can't pee in my face."

"Aww," he said, lowering his head.

"But I'll let you watch me pee."

"Really?" he asked, looking up.

"Sure. It'll be nostalgic."

"Coolness."

We both stood up and he followed me into the bathroom. I pulled down my panties and squatted on the toilet.

"Uhm. Could you do it in the bathtub so I can see it better?"

I nodded, got up, stepped out of my panties, climbed into the bathtub, spread my legs, squatted and peed. Julian kneeled down and watched the clear fluid stream out from between my legs, splash against the side of the tub, and flow down into a meandering puddle around my feet.

After I finished, I asked, "So, did you find it erotic?"

"What do you think?" he said, taking my hand and putting it on his crotch.

"Oh, poor thing," I said with mock seriousness. "Maybe, I'd better take a look at that."

"I think you'd better," he said solemnly.

I unbuttoned his fly and pushed down his jeans and underwear. His cock was only about half mast.

"What's your diagnoses, doc?"

"Well, I'm afraid things could be better," I said, taking his cock in my hand.

"What would you prescribe?"

"No question about it. Immediate and intense CPR."

I stuck his now entirely erect cock in my mouth and began slurping away.

I enjoyed giving blowjobs. It gave me a sense of power to make a man cum. The bigger his orgasm, the more jism that squirted into my mouth, the better I felt when I was done.

After I'd finished, Julian asked, "So you wanna move in or what?"

"Sure," I said, licking off a last bit of goo from my lip. His orgasm was just the way I liked them: messy.

I stood up and we put our arms around each other.

"I really, really like you, Christiane."

"Well, of course you do. Who else gives you such good blowjobs"

"No one, but," he said. "That's not what I mean. I mean I like you."

"Well, I like you, too, Nerd-boy," I said, and then bit his nose. Well, I really, really like you, too, Nerd-boy," I said and then bit his nose.

"Ow!"

"Oh, come on. That didn't hurt."

"I know."

"So why'd you say 'ow'?"

"I don't know, but you have something in your eye."

"In my eye? I don't think so."

"Yeah, I can see it. Here let me get it out for you."

Even though I knew he was probably full of shit, I let him hold open my left eye with his thumbs.

"Yup, there it is. I'll get it for you."

He then licked my eyeball.

"Eew!" I said, pulling away.

"That was kind of cool. You didn't like that?"

"I dunno. It felt kind of weird, I guess."

"Let me lick the other one."

"Let me lick yours first."

"You just did."

"Your eye, dork."

"Oh, okay. Go ahead."